Stealth Gaming Hardware (k3nshi)

So yesterday I went out for drinks with some ex-work colleagues. And unusually for me, I decided not to take a bag (usually full of a mix of gym stuff, notebooks, books, gaming hardware) with me. Hell, I would travel light for a change. So naturally I picked up my iPod Shuffle for audio stimulation, and then I figured I'd take the GBA SPastic as well. And The Spastic is all nice and everything but its still a bit too big and bulky. A GBA Micro on the other hand would have easily slipped into my coat pocket and not added any real bulk. Perfect to sneak some gaming action into situations where it would previously not be possible. So, I can see the point of a GBA Micro over a SPastic box. Doesnt mean I am going to pay the extortionate price for one though.

Oh Mobile phone games probably suck before anyone suggests I just play them.

Happy Birthday Mr Miyamoto (k3nshi)

Yes thats right, the "Nintendo hater" is saying Happy Birthday to Mr. Nintendo himself. Look he even has a shrine (click the link fools).

Clearly the man has a touch of games designing genius. Whilst I never have been fond of the Mario aesthetic, there is no denying that fact that the series has encompassed some of the greatest games made. Mario 64 is still untouchable as a 3D platformer, Mario Sunshine failing to get anywhere near its quality. And as for Mario World and the others in the 2D series, in a word: AMAZING.

In fact I am currently playing (on and off), one of my favourite games of this generation: Mario vs Donkey Kong on the spastic box. Whilst I dont think Mr Miyamoto had a hand in this one (actually I have no idea), his influence on this excellent little game is clear. In some ways a bit more limited than its GB forerunner (Donkey Kong), the newer game still features incredibly tightly designed levels and is fantastically playable. In fact it harks back to all the great things of Mario games, and the playability overcomes the retarded and incredibly annoying art direction. Sorry Mr Miyamoto, but the best character you designed was Donkey Kong.

Any way, the guy has created some amazing works and brought pleasure and frustration and delight to countless gimps around the world. And that's quite an achievement. So happy birthday, and I expect a guest editorial post by the end of the week. Do you hear me now?!!!

Beyond Hype and Syncophantary* (k3nshi)

(* may not be an actual word)

Yes I completed a game the other week. Ubisoft's critically acclaimied commercial flop: Beyond Good and Evil. You could read q's ridiculously sycophantic opinion of the game here or you could just read a review of it from Edge or something. The two are usually interchangeable (more or less).

The game itself is a pretty nice adventure game, the bulk of which consists of some sneaking around action. I actually liked this bit the best and so really enjoyed a lot of the game. The controls put MGS to shame, I might add. The difficulty curve for the most part is pitched on the easy side, and its a nice no-fuss kind of game to play. Its not all sneaking action though, there are some genuine surprises with some sections, which are done to a good standard. Yes thats vague, but any more and were deep into spoiler territory. AM I NOT MERCIFUL?!

Of course it all goes pear shaped on the end of game baddie level. I almost gave up at this point. From a primarily stealth based game, to a lame, stupidly boring boss level. Still the urge to complete the game (I want closure dammit!!!) meant I tried again later and managed to do it. Cue a cutscene or two for a lame ending to the story, and the hint of a sequel that will never be released. Nice.

Oh and I cant leave this blog post without talking about the atmosphere of the game. Qazimod might harp on about the emotional attachment he had to the characters, but you have to remember that he is emotionally stunted to begin with. I mean, he forms emotional bonds to his consoles, so what do you expect? God knows what would happen if he ever saw a Disney film - there would almost certainly be tears. The only game that I would say has had any kind of emotional resonance or impact on me was Ico. And BG&E is no Ico. Not even close.

The art style of BG&E is far too twee for my tastes, as are some of the characters. Its a kid's cartoon basically. There are some nice touches though, and it distinctly has a European flavour to it, which is a Good Thing. Maybe Ubisoft will do some kind of follow up but make Jade darker and give her some attitude (ie turn her into bikinni clad game slut with boobs at least three times bigger). They might sell more than 3 copies that way. Hey it worked for the Prince of Persia...

Icecream update (k3nshi)

Yes, I had icecream yesterday. I can now give you the definitive ice-cream rankings:

Waitrose Organic Icecream > Hagen Daas > Ben & Jerry's.

ICECREAMFACTS in YOUR FACE.

Halo 2: Heroic (k3nshi)

I completed Halo 2 on Heroic last night. So much better than playing in normal mode. In fact, I'd go as far as to say that Halo 2 in Heroic is a much closer gameplay experience to Halo (on Normal). Halo 2 in Normal mode is just totally boring.

Of course, now I want to play another Halo game. I want Halo 3 >now<.

Sleep Science (k3nshi)

More research into sleep:

"This process would allow cortical circuits to eliminate noisy synapses and renormalize in order to be ready for the next day," Massimini told LiveScience. The reduced activity might also help explain why performance in various tasks improves after sleep, he said.

Read more

Old Skool Terrorists? (k3nshi)

Amazing

Tin foil to block da transmissions man! (k3nshi)

So I received my Oyster card today. A quick google of the term revealed this amazing blog entry. Don't leave home without your tin foil - they could be listening...

Back to the Rumble Pit (k3nshi)

I booted up Halo 2 for the first time in ages the other day. It had been so long since I had last played it I still had two map packs and a game update to download. A side-effect of me not playing in such a long time was the fact my Halo 2 LIVE score had been reset to level 1. Rather than being a bad thing, this simply means I get to play a load of games with people who I can actually manage to, on occasion, shoot in the face and kill. This is infinitely more fun than working really hard and still being pwned by some motley collection of acne ridden game hermits.

Missionaries (the_debaser)

I went around town at lunchtime on my own today. I've been feeling pretty down recently, just pissed off with certain things and not happy with the way other things are going at the moment.

I was thinking the other day about how much time, money and energy I've wasted on things which in the great scheme of things do not matter one jot and things which do nothing to improve me as a person. Drink, drugs, sluts, clothes, dvds, games and so on. If I see some poor cunt into the street I'd rather spit in his face than give him a few quid to get some food.

Anyway, during my walk around town I went into Boots to get some hairgel and some Mach 3's. On the way out I was stopped by two people, a lad and a girl. I don't know why but I didn't carry on walking like I normally would. They explained to me that they were missionaries and offered to give me a little magazine to read. I said sure, and I was suprised when they didn't ask for any cash. They wished me on my merry way and I went off, back to work.

So with nothing better to do I've read this magazine. Its one of those religious things that try to help you live your life a 'better' way. Lots of the stuff in the magazine struck a chord with what I was thinking about a few days ago. How certain things can please one or more of your five senses, but which won't do anything to ease your mind, nor your soul.

Now I'm a seriously lapsed Catholic, and I'm not about to start up and Bible bash or none of that nonsense, but I reckon if I try and improve spiritually by being less selfish and thinking more of others, maybe (in a selfish way oddly enough) I'll be happier.

I'm going to give it a go anyway.

Revolution (k3nshi)

So they revelaed the controller at last. It sounds like a good idea - no, it sounds like a great idea. The concept video looks amazing. But anyone can knock up an amazing concept video. The proof will be in the games and the actual play experience. Until then, speculation about the merits of the controller are as pointless as the endless speculation of the power of the PS3 and the Xbox 360.

All hands: stay at DefCon 5.

In Training... (k3nshi)

I did my first official training run for the Run London event. Rather than keep posting about this stuff here, I have set up the RunLondon blog to keep all the painful details. Check it out motherbitches!

Ten Thousand Hits To Come (k3nshi)

So I signed up for the Nike Run London 10k run today.

People keep telling me I should find it easy, but I am not so sure. I guess I am really doing it because I see it as a challenge and I hope it will help me refocus on my dieting and excercie regime (hasnt worked so far: tonight I went to see a film - The Island - and then had pizza for dinner... It's been a bad week on the health regime front).

When will it end? (Van123)

You've all been kept up to date with my inane ramblings over the past few months, nay years, about a certain girl. You know the score - she loves me. She's a crazy one, though - I've lost count of how many times I've had to point this out to her.

So I got my GCSE results last week, and because I'm so cool, I got invited to two parties. Being the hip, swinging youth I am, I went to both. I called the second party to let them know I was on my way, but Weird Girl tried to stop me. She tried to persuade them not to let me come, because she'd feel awkward. That's right, 20 odd people who want me to go, and one who doesn't. The only thing for me to do, would be to head home for the night, to respect her feelings. But that's boring.

About two months ago, she confessed her undying love for me. Yay. But a month ago it got really interesting. She deleted me from her MSN list. Oh noes. Could this be the end of our relationship? This happened because I was a bit of a cock. She sent me email after email telling me how much she loves me. Eventually, I grew tired of reading the same old drivel, and decided to spice up our somewhat dead relationship - Because that's the type of lover I am. I replied to one of her many emails, with a mini Flash 'game' I made. Unfortunately, she wasn't able to open it (ooer), and replied explaining how she isn't scared of being shot down now. It was then I changed my approach. I told her how much I loved her, about how I was a cock because I was covering up my feelings yadda yadda yadda. Then came her reply, along the lines of "that's what I've always wanted to hear. You made me cry." I also slipped in that if she wasn't going out with someone, then I'd be there for her.

We're getting to why she delete me now. She deleted me, because I sent another email, in the same format. "I was a cock, because I was hiding my feelings" becomes "I was a cock, because I don't like you." Five or six well structured paragraphs putting her down. Then I got a reply. A single word reply, in an email. "Thanks." It was then I opened up MSN and said "You're welcome." So, then she deleted me.

Now, a week ago I went to the parties. I didn't speak to her at the second. Not because I had nothing to say, but because I could tell how upset she was. Couple that with her being drunk and in love. My mate gets a text after Weird Girl leaves. I don't get the text, because she doesn't have my number. Get in. It read something like "tell chris stpns its all about the chase." If there's one way to win me over, it's to shorten my name to something rediculous like that. But that got me thinking. The Chase? The chase is better than the catch, apparently, so the next day, I spoke to her on MSN (I didn't delete her). Now, remember, this is after a month of her not speaking to me.

She explained that because I made it impossible for her to 'get' me, she wants me even more. I suppose that's fair enough - Love's a complecated thing. But here's where it starts getting more interesting. I had a haircut, init, so I set it to my display picture on MSN. When I come back, I've got a message from Weird Girl. "WT! did u get ur haircut?" Oh here it is. She deleted me? Probably. But, she started a conversation with me, *and* could see my display picture. You can only do that, and see someone elses picture if they're on you MSN. SO I said that. Turns out she re-added me. For shame. She made such a big deal about not speaking to me, only to re-add me on the only thing I use to communicate with her.

We're coming to the end now, but before I leave, we have another interesting point. She brought up a party I went to a while ago. I say a while, I mean almost a year. I don't know why she chose that party, but she did. She said she was really upset when she found out I met a girl there and had a rather good time with her. I'll leave you with something from my MSN Log.

"ye, i wish it was me, but i cnt change wt happens or wt u feel, or feel like doing

so, u can do wteva u wnt, but i would always be there for u, more or less"

Unarmed (k3nshi)

So I have a GameBoy Spastic and a Pretty Shiny Plastic thing. I used to keep one of these devices in my bag for entertainment during my commute to and from work, but eventually stopped packing them when I realised that my time was better spent either reading something worthwhile or sleeping. Of course over the last three days I have found myself wanting to play a game, and searching my bag for a portable gaming device and found myself without the necessary equipment. As of tomorrow, a games machine gets added back to the Essential Equipment List.

Icecream Showdown (k3nshi)

Ok, so I didnt have an elaborate taste test set up in an amazing ICECREAM LAB (just imagine it though...), but I can proudly present to you the latest research in the exciting field of icecream science:

Waitrose Organic Icecream > Green & Black's Icecream.

It really is a lot better. Try it.

Videogames and violence. (Anonymous)

The "violent videogames cause violence" debate is back in the news again. And, as usual, the moral majority and games industry blame or slippery shoulder respectively. I’m in two minds on this issue - on the one hand I think that censoring or banning violent games is ridiculous scare-mongering on the part of the “anti-gaming” groups. On the other I think that games companies and the majority of gamers are sticking their heads in the sand and need to take a bit more responsibility for their output. Take 2, despite public denial, do want kids to play the likes of GTA and Manhunt because it makes them money. And todays parents are too lazy and irresposible to actively ensure their kids are playing games that are suitable.

The majority of non-gamers I speak to think that these modern ultra-violent games are just retarded fantasies for the socially inept, and I think these games do a lot to damage our pastime in the eyes of those people. My father’s opinion of games is the “it’s just childish zapping little green men and robots… grow up and do something useful” - one I’m sure a lot of you encounter.

The outcome is that nobody wins. Publishers may make short-term profits from blockbusters but are probably limiting long-term market size, kids are exposed to images they really shouldn’t see, and parents continue to be bloody useless.

Health and stuff (the_debaser)

After a particularly heavy session this weekend, I felt like complete shit on Sunday. And Monday. Chest pains. Sick stomach. That sort of thing. I'm OK today though.

2 of my uncles have died with heart problems before reaching retirement age, so its probably something which runs in the family. Luckily I'm not a smoker, nor do I just sit on my arse every day. However, I do eat an awful lot of crap. And I do drink to excess.

So, I'm giving up the beer for a bit. No doubt I'll miss it. But it'll help me save money. It'll stop me from forgetting what I did the previous night. It'll stop me staying in the house on Saturday afternoons nursing a hangover. And it'll also make me appreciate beer more as more than just a crutch which gets me through another relentless week of 'work-eat-sleep'.

To paraphrase the great Homer J, 'Lemonade will be my beer and feeling good will be my hangover'.

Paper Game Boy Micro (Wickedkitten)

Paper Game Boy Micro:

We’re never ever gonna get tired of paper

models of gadgets—especially unreleased gadgets. Apparently the same goes for the Japanese, who’ve been all up in

that scene since day one. Their latest target: the Game Boy Micro. Get your (fake) game on before any of the other kids

on the block, and in whichever colors and designs you bother digitally appliqueing to the thing.

[Download PDF]


[Thanks, SoDesu]

Attract Mode: Critical Failure (k3nshi) (k3nshi)

Earlier today me and a friend were in the arcade at London's Trocadero tourist and school kid ghetto. If it is a fair representation of arcades today, then the scene is in a truly dismal state. So many old, or old looking games: Daytona is still there and going strong. Daytona 2 was not being played at all. Spazmania and their ilk were going strong. Everything just seemed uninspired and lacking any appeal.

We spotted a Star Wars Pod Racing arcade game. Two people were playing it, and my friend thought it looked pretty cool. I thought it was a perfect example of where arcades have gone wrong. In an arcade I expect to see games that I would not imagine to be able to play on home hardware. A Star Wars Pod Racing game should have graphics comparable to the films, not to other 3D racing games which can be reasonably reproduced on home consoles. Remember the days you walked into an arcade and could only DREAM of playing those games at home? Thats what is missing - at the Trocadero at least.

Ok the costs... THINK OF THE COSTS of all that mega-hardware and software. I understand. But why not produce arcade hardware around high end PCs and mega gfx cards? This would be a lot better than filling the arcades with aging Model 2 and Model 3 arcade hardware. You could also cut software costs by building on top of APIs like OpenGL and DirectX. Surely this is the only way forward for the arcade industry?